In Pennish: In English:
Benchin' Convention
Elegator Elevator
Arse Cream Ice Cream
Penny: "(Gasp) We're going to Benchin'!"
Mommy: "Yes, Penny, we're going to the convention."
Penny: "We take the elegator? Where's the elegator?!"
Mommy: "The elevator is over there, Penny."
Evy: "And if we're good, we get ICE CREAM!"
Penny:"Arse cream?!!!"
Mommy: "ICE cream, Penny."
Seren survived her first 3 days of kindergarten. Barely survived. She "befriended" a boy on the first day. She came home with a scraped right knee the second day. Today, she came home with a really banged up left knee. I was informed that her friend pushed her down both days but the teacher saw it happen today and sent him home. Seren proclaims his innocence. Woe to him next week if he does it again and Seren no longer proclaims his innocence. I'm not sure that there will be much of this "friend" left to send home.
I was changing Xander's diaper in our minivan while Seren and Penny watched from their seats. As I was wrapping up Xander's icky diaper and he was still "commando", Seren asked if I was going to put a new diaper on him.
I replied, "No, Seren. I will not be putting another diaper on him. I am going to buckle him up in his carseat and he can be just as he is the rest of the day."
"WITH SHOES!" Penny chimed in, as Seren contemplated how serious I was about Xander going without a diaper the rest of the day.
Now, the part I find interesting about Penny's comment is that I never put shoes on Xander. Why would I? He isn't walking yet. So, as my 5 year old contemplated whether I would really let Xander go "commando" the rest of the day, my 2 year old recognized my sarcasm right away and immediately inserted her own sarcasm suggesting that I do something else I never do as well. What a comical visual picture she painted with that suggestion!
On the other hand, Seren probably did recognize my sarcasm, but knows that I can be crazy enough to mean exactly what I say sometimes.
In the end, Xander did get a diaper. Pun intended.
So, with less than two weeks before Kindergarten, Seren finally read her first word! "Puppy." I've been working on this girl for ages. Evy read her first word just shy of age 3. I've been working with Seren on her letters and sounds since she could talk (just like Evy), but this girl is SO stubborn about it that I had not made any progress until this past year. Although, she seems to know more than she lets on. So, I took her for a ride yesterday and bought some Puppy Chow for the cats (that's a different story) and she was expressing her frustration that she couldn't read. I told her she could read; she just needed to listen. When we got home, I took out the box and she refused to name any of the letters or sound them out. Stubborn! Then, I did the practice run and insisted she follow suit. Once she figured out the word Puppy, she wanted to work on the word Chow, which she did with ease. Of course, instead of being happy that she learned how to read, she threw a tantrum for the next hour because I was right...lol...Gah! From terrible two's thru to terrible twenties...and she's only five...
I remember when Evy first learned how to read. Her first word was "kitten." After that, she was trouble. She was only 3 when we were standing under a menu of a closed concession stand. Evy looked up at the menu and read, "P-I-Z-Z-A. Pizza! That word spells Pizza! I'd like to have some of that!" Mike looked up at the menu, "You're right, Evy. The word 'pizza' is up there. Daddy sees something up there he'd like to have too."
(Insert long pause here as Evy considers the menu). Evy, "B-E-E-R. Yup! I'll bet that's what you'd like to have!"
Now Seren will be as much trouble...lol
I dunno, but at least two have tried without much success. The smart one (Evy) decided to wrap it and take it's battered body outside. The other one (Seren) will remain jumpy until she sees it's corpse for herself. Uh-oh, the cat just rubbed up against her...let me scrape her off the ceiling...now she's screaming at the cat for startling her. Good morning!
That was what Evy said when she comforted Earl (our gray cat) over his ordeal with Mike's cologne.
I think I could put it in a very popular poetic format (like "If You Give Whoever-it-is a Cookie):
If Daddy Leaves Out a Spray Bottle of Cologne
If Daddy leaves out a spray bottle of cologne
Earl might knock it over onto the floor
If he doesn't, then he might sit on it
If he sits on it, chances are, it will spray his bottom
If it sprays his bottom, he will jump into the mirror
When he jumps into the mirror, he'll startle his brother, Grimmy
If Grimmy is startled, he'll jump (maybe onto the bottle of cologne?)
If Grimmy jumps, Earl will likely jump again
Then run as far away from the spraying cologne as possible
This will cause Evy to pick him up and comfort him
Picking him up will remind Evy how good he smells
Evy will say: "Earl smells elegant!"
If Earl smells elegant, Evy will have Daddy smell and explain the events to him
If Dally smells Earl, chances are,
Daddy will no longer want to use a cologne that reminds him of a cat's rear
But, since Daddy doesn't like to waste stuff
He might continue to use it for that purpose
After all, it is Earl, who just walked by
And smells quite elegant
