My husband is not the ogre he pretends to be...

From the moment we first started dating, Mike warned me that he never wanted pets. He hates the smell, the fur, etc., etc., although he loves animals in general.  When I learned of this, I seriously had to consider whether I was willing to live without pets for the rest of my life.  I decided that he was worth it and some months later we married and moved into an apartment where pets were not allowed.

Well, when we moved to these apartments, we had only been there a few weeks when we discovered a severely emaciated stray cat.  Pets or no pets, I am not one to let an animal starve to death.  I was glad to find out that neither was he and we went to the store and bought this cat all sorts of canned catfood, crunchies, etc.  We even designated a bowl for him to eat out of right in front of our doorstep.

It turns out, as our emaciated kitty started to get healthier, we found he had to fight off other cats to eat the food we were trying to feed him.  Mike would have none of that, so he would bring the kitty in to eat his food for a few minutes then kick him back out.  Soon these visits lasted hours, then evenings, then entire nights.  The cat we used to address as kitty became Kitty Bear.  Eventually we moved and took him with us.  Mike wasn't there when I took the cat to the vet and had him put to sleep.  At the time, he assured me that he already said his good-byes when the cat fell ill and he packed him into the car to go.  Looking back on it now, I can say that was probably true, but also that he probably wouldn't have kept his composure if he was there during the last moments.  I can say for certain that even ten years later, that stray was, and probably always will be, Mike's favorite cat.  I wash my hands of any responsibility for such a strong attachment forming, other than buying food to feed a starving cat. 

However, since Kitty Bear, we have not found ourselves catless.  I take full responsibility for that.  It was I who brought home our current cat, Thissy.  Thissy is probably the most boring cat we have ever had.  Well, her lack of knowledge and/or intelligence can be entertaining on its own.  However, most of the time we find ourselves laughing at her and not with her.

For example, since we have had Thissy, she has not been outdoors much.  This is not because we won't let her, it's because she's too scared to go outside.  She started going outside a couple of years ago, probably because of another stray cat that showed up at our door, Ricky.

Ever since we have had Thissy, Mike has made it clear that he doesn't want anymore cats - ever.  Well, after boring Thissy, I'm not sure I want anymore either.  Then Ricky shows up one day.  Yes, another stray shows up at our door.  Mike discovered him while he was getting ready for work.  A poor little, four month old kitten was mewing at our patio door, which faces a busy street.  The cat was as hungry as could be.  Mike took him right in.  Me, "Dear, I thought you didn't want another cat..." Mike, "That's true, but this cat is cute!"  So, Ricky was our guest for 6 months and then disappeared not too long after he was neutered. Can you blame him?

Anyways, 18 months later and our girls are still upset about his disappearing act.  Really, Thissy is just not a fun pet for them to have.  Mike and I have talked about getting a small dog or a kitten and it's always the same thing: "I don't want any more pets!" But, the truth came out last summer when Mike had his surgery and he was under the influence of oxycontin (otherwise known as Truth Serum for Mike).  We were passing by a Free to Good Home sign with the picture of two black kittens.  He insisted that I call to see if they were still available.  Ricky had just disappeared a few months before and I'm pretty sure he was missing the little guy.  Well, someone already snatched up the pair of black kittens and we've been stuck with just Thissy ever since.  Until...

...I saw a headline in the paper on Sunday: Two Kittens for the Price of One at our local animal shelter.  I mentioned it to Mike. His response: "Er...uh...TWO kittens???" "Well, we're only looking and we don't HAVE to get two kittens..." I said.  "Now, why do we want kittens?" Mike asks.  "Because, dear, it's been almost two years since Ricky showed up at our door and our kids still miss him terribly.  Thissy just isn't all that engaging." He snorted in agreement at that statement then said, "Has it really been two years already?"  Yes, it had and both of the other girls had recently cried about missing their buddy, especially after meeting a neighbor's cute kitten.  Mike had met it also and had agreed to entertain the idea of another kitten sometime next spring. But, the special was going on now...

...So, I quietly packed the cat carrier in the car without the kids being any wiser, taking note of my husband's raised brow and smirk."Just looking, eh?" "Yes you are, my dear. Just in case you see any you like," I say.

Grumble, grumble, grumble...yet he got into the car and drove us there anyway, despite the kids being extra obnoxious with intolerable behavior. I was careful not to let on what we were doing, just in case he decided to turn around or change his mind for some reason.  He drove on anyways. He parked the car and went inside with the checkbook. Ten minutes later he was back to the car, opening the doors, and announcing to the kids that he needs their help picking out kittens. After much meeting and greeting, we finally settled upon two rambunctious brothers that seemed to have the constitution to put up with our brood despite their youth - and the youth of our children.

Mike is not a paperwork guy, but he was happy to volunteer to complete it and pick out names: Bash & Crash. He was pleased with the price too: $40 for two fixed males, shots, licenses, and microchips included.  So far, he's played with the kittens more than our kids have :)

Honestly, I cannot say that he genuinely wanted the kittens or that he's happy they are a part of our family.  However, I can say that he has finally had his revenge upon our other cat who has chewed through every computer cord we have purchased for his laptop.  The kittens may or may not give him much satisfaction, but the fact that our other cat is highly upset about this whole arrangement has.

Penny Thoughts

Yes, this is what I am calling my most recent chapter in my life.  My youngest turned two last month and now she is asserting herself.

As I have described in my last post, all of my girls are helpful and try to imitate what we do as parents to the best of their abilities.  Penny, my two-year-old, is no exception.  In fact, she demonstrated this quite well Monday morning.  About 7:30am, I received the following text from my husband:

Daddy to Penny: time to wake up Evy. Penny: go wake Evys? Daddy: oh, are you going to wake up Evy? Penny while getting up and leaving: yep. Then from girls room: wake up Evy. Evy: no response. Penny while whacking her: WAKE UP EVY!!! Evy: some indeterminate muffled sounds and an okay, okay. Penny returns to our room and goes back to playing with big red ball.

Yes, Penny has learned how to help out with getting our seven year old up for school AND she is very effective.

Of course, these days she not only imitates us, her parents, but whatever wildlife she can imagine.  Tonight she went straight from imitating a dog to imitating a butterfly.  One minute she was on all fours, barking like a dog, and the next minute she's running around announcing she's a butterfly.  I agree with Jeff Foxworthy's comment that we certainly learn a lot from our kids.  Before tonight's experience, I had no idea that a doggy could simply cocoon under any pink reversible blanket and come out instantly as a butterfly donning leopard wings fashionably coordinated with pants decorated with princess froggies.

This brings me back to my original point: the title of my new chapter in life.  Many of my friends are familiar with the one I've started prior to this, called Serenisms.  It turns out that Penny is worthy of her own chapter and I am naming it Penny Thoughts.  One of these days, hopefully when I'm on maternity leave, I'll have a chance to figure out how to devote sections on here to the content of these chapters.

As I wrote this, I considered that some of you may be wondering if I have kept a log, or chapter, for my oldest child, Evy.  The answer is, no I have not.  Well, I've handwritten a few things through the years, but not enough to start a chapter.  Although this might seem sad at first, I think that my friends who know Evy would know why.  Evy is a child very different from her siblings.  Although she is animated and goofy, she is truly more of a soulful, insightful child.  A chapter written about what she does would not do her justice, but a mural would. So, I plan on posting her artwork and some of her stories as time goes on.  I guess one might say that she is the author and illustrator of her own chapter, we're merely spectators.

On this note, I say, "Goodnight folks!" And, "Until next time!"

Just an update from over the weekend...

It's Wednesday morning and I am up way before my alarm has gone off, so I figured this would be a good time to post and prove I haven't forgotten about my blog!

This week has been uneventful so far, so I'll share what I meant to post on Sunday before I was distracted by my artists.

First of all, I love how our children imitate everything we do as parents.  Sometimes this works out to our advantage.  I like nothing more than to get praise for a job well done, or just putting in the effort.  So far, I've heard, "Mommy, thank you for cleaning my bathroom."  "Mommy, thank you for doing the laundry."  Last night my Seren said, "Daddy, thank you for serving the food. Mommy, thank you for making it."  These kinds of words reinforce that we're doing the right thing by them.

Mike is now experiencing the same imitation of his actions now that he is the one taking care of them during the day. Unfortunately for him, this backfired...almost literally.

What I was told was that he was innocently standing at our cafe table working on his computer when he made the indiscretion of passing gas with our 2 year old in the room.  She recognized the sound and felt the need to immediately check his diaper. Apparently, she decided to take a good, close whiff of his pants, then exclaimed, "Ugh! New diaper! UUUGGGGHHH!" I can't remember if she actually brought him one...

Also, we had an adventure trying to get rid of a mattress we just had no room for. It was a decent Ikea mattress in decent shape with a washable cover.  It was our bright idea to make it a Goodwill donation.  So, about 8pm on Saturday we set about donating it.  Mike warns me that he only found a bit of twine, so he was only able to tie down 2 corners of it on top of our minivan. Thankfully, the Goodwill is only a mile away and quite a doable trip at 20mph.  So, we get there and drop off some extra clothes, but they don't take mattresses.  "Do you take children?"

We left with what we came with: the mattress securely fastened in our car and our kids slightly twined on top of the minivan...oh wait, it was the other way around.  Wishful thinking, I suppose.  Anyways, we were left to wonder what we were to do with it as we traveled home. We jokingly threw out a few ideas as we passed a few apartment complexes on our way, "Hon, do you think anyone would notice if we dropped it off at their garbage bin?" I would have suggested our own garbage bins but our mattress was on top of our car all afternoon and our HOA would have known who to charge for disposal (although that should be in our HOA fee already, right?).

We pull into our condo community and Mike suggested the location of our recycling bins.  I pointed out that I thought that the signs on the bins excluded furniture.  We were able to verify that as we drove by.  We decided to go ahead and park our van in our spot and deal with it in the morning, if the mattress was still there, of course.  Yes, we did pass up the opportunity of just loading it into any miscellaneous truck bed we found along the way.  Although, I would have loved to see the reaction of the driver as it was discovered someone left a gift in his truckbed as opposed to stealing whatever he had in it (to be expected in our neighborhood).

Mike parks our van and un-twines the mattress as I herd loud, tired, and fussy children into our unit.  We have decided to post a "Free" sign on the mattress and hope it disappears by morning.  When I was done making the sign, I go back out to Mike and the van to find them both gone!  Along with the mattress, of course.  Did he take one of our suggestions seriously???  As I turn to head back in, I see him driving back into our lot.  It turns out that as he was un-twining the mattress, one of our neighbors was walking by with her dog.  She complimented the mattress and said she needed one like it.  "Oh  REALLY?" Mike said.  It worked out great for both us and our neighbor :)

Good morning!

This morning I find myself trapped in an art galleria of which I have no recollection of making the pilgrimage to attend. As I walk though this art galleria, I find Ikea foam mattresses aligned in a Stonehenge-like creation. I see 3 busy artists making this creation and one proudly calls it a fort.

I move past this masterpiece in search of the goodie table where they may have snacks this early in the morning. It turns out that the Lord and Master of this Galleria has hidden the Tollhouse Chocolate Chip cookies in the cupboard with the drinking glasses for milk. I sneak a few, including a few extra for the artists to tip them in exchange for their silence. I'm hoping their silence will last a long, long, time.

I make my way back down the hall where I found myself in this strange land when I woke up. I consider what I might do in this land and it occurred to me that my laptop made it here as well. I open it up and immediately one artist senses the electronic transmission of a customer who has found something else other to do than admire the art in the galleria. I immediately get the most personal customer service.

In comes an eclectically dressed artist wearing tousled hair and a tattered tutu, along with a smudge of chocolate on her face. She displays the latest creation from the Head Artist: a sketch of a prince handing flowers to a princess. Inside this piece of art, designed after a greeting card, is the personal scribblings of this chocolaty artist. I'm instructed to read a language I do not understand. Once I do, she dismisses herself and then returns with more art and unintelligible notes. This goes on for quite a while.

In the meantime, I am trying to open up my blogger and make a post about the week. These artists don't seem to understand that I woke up in the wrong place! I was expecting my bedroom and maybe a morning's cup of coffee, but somehow I cannot locate either one of them. I find myself trapped in a galleria of screaming artists trying to reshape each other's faces, and rearrange each other's toys, and somehow customize their books by removing pages...

Alas, one of the artists needs a diaper change and I am brought back to my world of reality. The world I know in a 2 bedroom condo filled with two adults and three children (soon to be four). The world of unnumbered obstacles. A place where the word "silence"doesn't even appear in the dictionary because no one knows what it means. However, I fondly recall that this place has a large bathtub, and a noisy fan that drowns out most high-pitched screams of beings who are tortured within the rooms surrounding it...and I smile...because I'm going to go hide in this place that I haven't been for awhile.

The Beginning

I have started this blog because I was annoying my Facebook friends with WAY too many status updates.  Well, actually, they haven't said that because they're too polite, but I can take a hint.

As my profile says, I am a mom of three, soon to be four.  My life is fairly ordinary and mundane, but I try to make it entertaining.

I used to be a full-time mom, but now that's my husband's job. Yes, he is one of the casualties of this Great Recession and just can't seem to find a job. I, on the other hand, had no problem finding a job bookkeeping.  Yes, it's very boring, but numbers are my passion. So, that means that I get to work and he gets to stay home with the kids and look for work.  Needless to say, the change in roles has been an eye-opening adventure.

Although I have been successful in the working world before, my husband has never stayed home to take care of the kids full-time "unsupervised."  I must admit that I had my misgivings about this arrangement at first, but he's turned out to be an awesome Mr. Mom.

Our three children, Evy, Seren, and Penny, keep him very busy. Evy is our oldest, going on 8. She is our "informer", as Bill Cosby so aptly described in one of his comedy skits. Seren is short for Serenity, but she is otherwise known as Volatility. She is four and has not grown out of her terrible two's yet.  She is our "terror", but she's also our kick in the pants. Eventually, when I figure out how to use this blog, I will have a whole area devoted to Seren-isms.  Penny is just two. Sweet as could be little girl who used to have a growing vocabulary. Now the only word she says is, "MINE!"

If three girls wasn't enough, we have a rambunctious boy on the way.  I really don't know what we're going to do with a boy.  We're already struggling to find a name.  We'll get to meet him sometime in November or December.

Anyways, I look forward to sharing stories and pictures on here and hopefully entertain someone looking to jump out of his or her life and on into mine for a few.

Let's see if I can post some pics to get us started...