In the dark...

Crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch...
Me: (sleep disturbed, look over at crunching noise and see dark cat silhouette chewing on misplaced hanger) Pfffssssst!
Cat silhouette: (stops crunching, stares at me)
Me: Pffffsssssst!!!
Cat silhouette: (stares)
Me: (smacks pillow on floor near cat silhouette)
Cat silhouette: (disappears)
Me: (turn over, close eyes, snooz--)
Crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch...
Me: (smacks pillow on floor again and listens...quiet...close eyes...)
Crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch...
Me: (throws pillow at cat silhouette)
Cat silhouette: (gone)
Me: (reclaim pillow, turn over, close eyes...)
Crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch...
Me: (suddenly sit up)
Cat silhouette: (stops crunching, stares...)
Me: (throws pillow, missing cat silhouette)
Cat silhouette: (runs down near foot of bed)
Me: (Sees cat silhouette #2, but thinks it's cat silhouette #1, throws shoe at #2)
Cat silhouette #2: (Jumps apprehensively, as if to say 'hey! what did I do???')
Me: (realizes cat silhouette #1 is gone, turn over, close eyes)
Crunch, crunch, crunch, crunch...
Me: (sit up suddenly, toss pillow at cat silhouette)
Cat silhouette (runs to hide quickly under bed, whilst cat silhouette #2 looks on wondering if I'm about to throw a shoe at him again)
Me: (sees tail silhouette peeking out from under bed, holds it briefly, drags heavy cat silhouette out from under bed...EARL!!!)
Cat silhouette #2, Grimmy: (runs into master bathroom seeking safety)
Me: (tosses heavy Earl silouhette in close behind him and shuts door, gets in bed, closes eyes, can't sleep, realizes it's 5:30, posts experience on FB)
Good mornin'!