...in addition to our kittens we got in October, we now have new goldfish. My husband insisted that it would be good for our girls to have goldfish. I assured him that Grimmy and Earl, our kittens (now half grown), would agree with him. I warned him that our older cat, Thissy, may just hide under the bed for a week once she has discovered their presence.
Personally, I can't say that I'm terribly excited to have 5 more little creatures to clean up after or take care of. I can hear my readers say, 'But goldfish are simple and contained. They're really easy.' My answer to that would be that cactus are simple, contained, and easy also, but I've never had one survive in my care. I'm pretty sure my children survive only because I'd be arrested if they didn't. Plus, like cats, they kind of fend for themselves. I'll I need to do is keep them away from the street and throw a bowl of chow their direction once in awhile.
Anyways, I really did try to talk my husband out of the purchase of goldfish yesterday. However, since the bowl, gravel, peek-a-boo hideout, and fish food (to feed our live cat treats) only cost about $15 altogether, I gave in.
As we made our way to the cash register at Walmart, I envisioned what the future of these poor fish would be at our house. Of course, I envisioned Grimmy and Earl overcoming their fear of water to chase fish in the bowl rather than chase the bugs attracted to the light of the TV as we tried to watch a movie. To me, that right there made the fish a good investment.
I had other visions too. One of which was the future of the fish if Penny decided to play with them. I can see it now: Penny takes ownership of the fishbowl from off of the counter and walks it on over to the kitchen, splashing the water every which way. Then, realizing the bowl is empty, holding it up under the ice dispenser at the refrigerator and overfilling the bowl with ice and water the way she does with her water cup. I can also see her pouring the contents of the bowl into some other container, back and forth, just as she does when she gets her hands on two cups when one contains her drink. And, if she's anything like Seren, I could see the fishbowl making it all the way into the bathroom. Will the final destination be the bathtub or the toilet? Either way, I'd better have the number for Roto Rooter.
This was all running through my head as I carried the fish in a bag, in my hand, trying to keep it out of reach of Penny who kept running up to it and clapping her hands around it on each side like it was a baloon she was trying to pop. The thought occurred to me that maybe the fish wouldn't make it to the checkstand alive.
We did make it to the checkstand though. As we waited, I evaluated the contents of our cart: 2 large packs of beer (found on sale), snow saucers, and goldfish with all of their necessary accesories. With this being a Walmart checkstand and SuperBowl being so soon, I kept trying to think of an appropriate redneck joke as I held the goldfish out of the reach of a dodging Penny and collaborated with Seren on what their names would be.
In the midst of this, we got a wiley cashier who was either too intelligent or too oblivious to be working at Walmart. As she was scanning the alcohol, she asked who was buying it. We both indicated that Mike would be and she asked for his identification. After she saw his, she asked to see mine also because I look under 40. She seemed as if she was teasing (dry sense of humor?) Not that I care whether I'm carded or not, but when I have my hands full trying to pacify 3 small children, who were both clamoring for the goldfish and for their lunch, I couldn't help but be a stinker and tease her in return that since I'm not making the purchase, I don't have to provide my ID. She did explain that I should feel flattered that she thinks I'm under 40 and said something about it being policy to card everyone in the party with the person making the purchase who looked under 40 to be sure the alcohol is not being purchased for underage persons. She said that if we didn't have our little ones with us, then she'd probably insist on it. Asked her that since we do have them and they look under 40, would she be carding them too?
As we left, Mike tried to explain that she had a dry sense of humor and was trying to pay me a compliment by saying I look under 40. I explained to him that I understood that and had even thanked her for that, but if she is going to pretend to hassle a frazzled mom busy with 3 small kids, she'd better expect some light hassling back just because I can. It doesn't mean I didn't get her joke or her humor, but she obviously didn't get mine ;)
At any rate, we got the fish home safely then picked Evy up at school, got the kids a snack, and made a fun shopping trip to Ikea. After that, we went to dinner and that is what supplied the inspiration for yesterday's Serenism.
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